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I still think about you
Last night
I visited the tenement house
where we used to live
twenty some years ago.
I sat on the curb across the street,
watching for your face,
waiting for your smile,
wondering what went wrong:
"Why has the love of my life left me,"
and "Why am I still here?"

This morning
I was watching a young couple
sitting on the front stoop of the tenement house
where we used to live.
He was angry and confused;
She was hurt and had been crying.
I could see that he was mostly afraid,
but he wouldn’t admit it to himself.
Mostly she was angry,
but she didn’t seem to know this;
perhaps she just didn't care anymore.
And the end of the world was at their feet
as they stared into
the face of Destruction:
That old Devil,
Silence.

Right then it seemed that
there was no hope.
When, suddenly
one small chance flashed between them:
Fluttering timidly, fleetingly,
like a butterfly.
And they reached out
and caught that one last hope,
clinging to the lifeline,
Afraid to let go

In an instant
they captured all creation with each a careful smile, that said,
“I’m sorry.”
“I don’t know why I hurt the one I love.”
“Please forgive me, and never let me go.”
“Never let me stare into this abyss again.”
“I can’t live without you.”

Right then
I said a silent prayer.
“Wherever you are, Elaine,
I want you to find happiness.
Even if I’m not there to share it with you,
My heart is there.”


I still care about you.
~Mark A. Rector